This was a tough match, not only because the previous weeks fixture and training was called off due to the bad weather but everyone still had bags of undigested Christmas dinner they needed to burn off – and quick!

12 players travelled to Sunbury for this vital match – 2′nds and 3′rds we’re missing players – we did our best to accommodate them. We needed the push for the rest of the season and everyone looked dry at the previous training session – everyone had a lot to prove and lose (especially around the waist!!).

Manj and Tan we’re the first to arrive at the changing rooms with their kit handlers (Amar and Akal) – they we’re eagerly awaiting for everyone to turn up late so they could go into ‘Plaha Mode’ (M* Ch**d, B**n Ch**d!) – which can also easily be mistaken for ‘Dhamu Disposition’. Everyone turned up and the mode was set. It was good to see Bahader back in the side after missing the first part of the season with injury – his contribution will be vital if we are to progress and we also needed someone new to take the piss out off – there’s only so much you can say about Tan and Jassai!!

The game started with quick attacks from both sides and the Sunbury boys made sure we felt their physical presence – it wasn’t going to be easy. Sach, Prabbie and Bahadur really began to get into the thick of it – our centre half was no where to be seen for the first 10 minutes…you wouldn’t have known we had a Soor in the side!

Suddenly Sach, who was arguing consistently with the umpires, twisted his ankle, not because he was putting in some strong tackles, not because he was dribbling past players like Dian Chand, and not because he was the main feeder to our forwards – no he was just running gently like a lady and twisted on his pigeon foot! What a plonker!

But…wait…’is it a bird’…’is it a plane’…’no it’s Super Manj!’. Who came to the rescue to fill in his pigeon styled feet – determined not to do a ‘Rodney’ but to carry on the tradition to also argue with the umpires throughout the duration of the game.

OK – enough…..here’s the short of it…..

Makhi – looked threatening – dislocated his finger – Parmi came to the rescue as Manj wept!

Close game and Sunbury physical.

Raje – got a whack for being in the right time and right place.

No score in second half.

Tan and Gurm made some vital tackles – Jassa made a nuisance of himself….dribbling and taking on the same player twice!

Prabbie made some daring moves but just couldn’t find the finishing touch – the christmas turkey was still running inside him

Scored early second (bahadur) half and looked dominant going forward – but frail at the back.

We had some good moves but Sunbury too came back with moves that we just managed to keep out.

Sunbury scored as Jassa gave the ball away just in our half and we got punished big time!

Parmi was reassuring as the gala meister!

Gurj made some brilliant save (Man of the match) – made a save whilst getting up.

Sati scored the winner with 15 minutes to go and we held out.

Well deserved carved out result!!!

Match Stats
Date played: 23rd Jan 2010
Venue: Away
Man of the Match: Gurj

Please check your emails regularly as we may have a 2hour slot indoor tomorrow or Thursday.

Sach

The new site includes a blog and integration with Twitter and will now be available for all to contribute their two cents.

The best way to lead is by example and so I scored in the first minute. Not blowing trumpets but laying facts. A few minutes later we had done it again courtesy of Bad Boy Manj and his reluctance to let go of the ball earlier…it payed off. On the other end, Man of the Match, Papu made two very crucial saves and commandeered the back lines.
Monty Python, also back from the scouts African nite screamed for Top Dog to pass him the ball. Well, he had every right as he was open most of the times.

On the other hand Noddy who has still not bought those high heels so that he can be spotted nearly lost his cool, demanding the ball everytime he was open. But rather selfishly we all ignored him. Once again Noddy, luminous orange patka ban ke ayee next season!! But then again, he missed two sliding deflections near the goal line. You’d have finished in stylee my dost!!!

Impeccable smiley new daddy Sunny, made excellent incursions into ‘enemy territory’ and gave brilliant passes from midfield. KoolBeer Pargat singh thighs kondo bila mukia was denied a penultimate hit take at the top of the D when our old short-corner Hog Top Dog once again denied him. How selfish yaar??? Even at our last game Top Dog Pumba denies Timone his thunder. Hadh hogi, ehneh short korner lehke rajjeah nehi???

JD, Monu, Jalebi Dribbler went back to his old habits, loving the ball more than the team mates. Having said that, he is the legs of the team as he made quite a few good tackles in our defence. And JD scored our final goal of the season.

Invariably, farasi ya miguu mbili anakimbia bila mafuta Bwana Sharon came forward in a sign of rebellion against Top Dog who had banned him from the front lines being a poor soldier. Lakini, in what can only be described as the goal of the season voted for by a panel consisting of moi, myself and I ( too much haumai(ego), yaar!!) his hit from the side line was deflected past the opponents keeper into the roof of the net. C’mon, while those guys at SAGA wait, Surya complimented our lead of 3-2 at that point. This Old Boy’s heart needs no pace maker yet, he handles the ball, makes a few moves and more importantly passes the ball. These are skills the youth should take on board. Watch and learn guys, some old dogs know quite a few tricks.

The moment of madness hardly ever passes our team every game. No it wasn’t Fat Boy Slim Tandeep raging at the referee for a change by myself after being tripped and pushed by an opponent. This shameful act was frowned upon by Rudolp the Rednose Ranbir Referee who chided me for stooping so low and acting incoherently, trying to walk out of the pitch. He rather factually asked me what kind of example I was setting to the youngsters. I do sincerely apologize to the whole team for behaving in a manner not like a sportsperson. Actually I just wanted to cool off outside and let someone else play since we had two subs.

Kraptain put it perfectly when he described what Top Dog has taught the team not to do-behave like a captain. Captains have their weaknesses too. This certainly wasn’t the finish in style that was desired by Top Dog as he missed a penalty in the final minute, especially not after I had set the example the weekend before, also in the final minute.

All in all we won 4-2 and can claim a second position in the league table. That means a promotion for us thirds. We have had ups and downs, we’ve battled and won, been rattled and lost, yet came out winners in the experience of life.

I would like to wish all the lads good future and look forward to the next season unless the first’s pay good money then I’m all theirs.

Until then I remain at your sewa,

Satnam Singh

Having had a taste of playing with the seconds and perhaps showing them a trick or two…or three??…I waited beside the phone for that call to come and play for them again. Umm, it might have been an email, I’m not too sure, but the records showed the seconds were dicing with novices (Harrow had never won ANY match this season) whereas the thirds faced a much stronger opponent in the form of Sonning. Had we known beforehand then we’d have paid respect in a minutes silence for the young lad who came to watch our previous match on a stretcher. Sadly he died. And my call never came, nevertheless the soldier battles on.

The game had begun when I got there with “outstanding” player DTY doing what he does best…standing out!!!! In the absence of Motor Mouth Hardy, our sage Bhagat had to do most of the talking whilst handling the midfield. Who says guys cannot do two things at the same time?? Koach had insulated himself well in the April heat of 17C as he kept custody in Goal. Despite Harrow’s reputation, Koach got tested once when they scored a very simple goal. All the spectators cheered for Harrow, yes All of us….Bhagat’s jaw dropped……dude, we were only supporting their skills and admonishing our defence’s weakness by that gesture. C’mon, ek goal naal ki hoya???

AnMole having rested his wrist, functioned like a pro and as usual photographic evidence shows Pali the workhorse running millions of miles in the pitch holding fort. In a game where Cudly Bear Bhups and Koach could have gone for coffee during the game , most spectators would have suffered neck pains due to looking in one direction most/all of the time – In Harrow’s D!!!! Our boys knitted the mittens, rattling the boards every 9 minutes. Even Bloody Koolwant had no excuses this time. Hey, before you condemn me for use of foul language, he was bleeding profusely from the nose after a knock. Hmmm, maybe that’s what Koach was worried about, if he’d played for the first’s he’d probably be worse off?!?!?!?! Nose bleed teek ya!!!less painful then gala from Team Manager/ Head Coach/ Chief Spectator/ Head Honcho, ain’t it???

Gobind played as well as the weather would let him (yeah, heh??). Bad Boy Manj sported mean looks at the opponents, with curvy dribbles and slicy passes. He needs a curry at half time that boy does!! Export Jalebi Dribbler JD aka Monu played under harsh conditions considering Ginger Bread Man Rajveer rebelliously, hardly scored yet dished out harsh tell offs to JD. Koini veera, bol bali di gal hundi yaa, dil nu na lagayee!!! Strangely, both played hard, what’s up with that, guys??

Smart talk from Big Daddy Sukhy at half time calmed the team down. He speaks from experience. And plays hard at the back. Respek Bruv!! And yes, retirement by JD meant DTY could play a full half time game. Woo Hoo DTY!! Something to write home about ,eh??

At the end of the game we had won 8-something although we could have easily scored more. But in all fairness, it was simply a day to enjoy ourselves in the good sunshine, win or lose. Well done lads!!!

Kudos to Kraptain too, who showed fairness in his refereeing and not only that, he sets an example by taking his time to be a ref and not play instead. I’m sure not many of us could do that. I certainly would prefer to play than to ref. Thanks again Kraptian!!

GOOD LUCK FOR THE NEXT SEASON BOYS!!!

Satnam Singh

Lads from the thirds ( on free hire) apprehensively donned red shirts, a first for some, woo hoo!! Perhaps they just have extra shirts, the seconds??? Koach reminded us to play as a unit if we needed to succeed. Meanwhile I was trying to make peace with Kraptain in the hope of getting 5 minutes of fame, sorry game. We were boosted with the arrival of our reliable Goal Keeper, Raju.

The game started after what seemed like a weeks training packed into 5 minutes.Phew!! What do we warm up to if the body is constantly at 37C??? I wonder!! The opponents looked menacing , however words from our gentle cuddly Bear Bhups were still ringing in our ears- ” check them out for the first ten minutes”. Yeah don’t mistake him for only cuddly, he’s as solid a defender as it gets.

New daddy Sunny couldn’t have been grinning wider as he weaved his magic from our back line to the front. Vadaiya hon mundeya, ladoo ta ley anda?? chalo, next time seyi. Meanwhile it’s an established fact that neither Hardy nor Bhagat have any martial arts skills as they could not hold Bruce Lee at bay, let’s face it, their midfielder was good. And like a married couple they had their random bickering on and off the pitch. More proof that two center halfs make a fool, sorry, full. Yes I know-@ Rita’s. Now if motor mouth Hardy could only stop yelling at the refs we’d all have more time playing the game. C’mon veera, style up yaar!!! Tere muuh vich jaraab pa deni asi, fer muuh bandh rehega!!!

Bad boy Manj made two assists (he claims), scored twice (almost thrice he kept claiming in the changing room) but also played a big role in getting us hammered 5 goals. Yes Manj, kini vari keya ball clear karla, hit nehi lagdi? ehna besharam teetdh, hadh hogi!!! Koolwant played well, given that he had a bad ankle injury and was ’scared’ of playing for the firsts, as Koach put it, they’d wipe him out in a few minutes at their pace. But I keep telling the lad he is good enough to play for a higher ranked team. Lehkin aaj kaal dhe naw javan munde nehi suunthe bazurgah di gal!!! Scored a goal though, well done son, thanks to a simple pass from, moi.

Ginger bread man Rajveer, jineh maa da dudh pita yaa, was all guns blazing as he scored a rumal trick (No, singhs don’t wear hats!!) Couldn’t fault the young lad. Pali, the farasi of the seconds, gave all khorapower as usual. College dude Amandeep made dashing runs, hustled the opponents and made good passes. Definately a good improvement from last time.

We were on level pegging throughout most of the game. Then Koach introduced JD, the Jalebi Dribbler who has turned a new leaf, he was passing the ball!!!!!!! Amazing, one two dribble and pass. Bahot aache veera!!!

They say you cannot teach an old dog new tricks, but if the old dog has learnt plenty of tricks during his time, he can sometimes unleash them when least expected. Yes, whereas Rajveer scored a rumal trick, I summed it up with a Dhumalla trick, the last one being a penalty take. Greedy Bad Boy Manj was denied that opportunity by our very own sage Bhagat who asked myself to have the honour of taking that penalty. I owe you one bruv!!!

Final score 8-5 to us, woo hoo!!!!

One cannot forget to mention the presence of our keen supporters Top Dog, Farasi ya miguu mbili anakimbia bila mafuta Bwana Sharon, Koroga pargat singh kondo Koolbeer and others. Thank you for being there.

How could I forget Kraptain, who’s going to feel spammed by this email, but anyway, he did a good job as a referee – free and impartial. AnMole, the pani wala, got a dubious injury on the wrist doing….raab jane!!! You could claim from the plumbers y’know….if the sink is too close??? On a serious note, he has shown commitment just by his mere presence, even though he did not play. That speaks alot more than some of us would be willing to accept. In the changing room Kisumu star Captain Prabbie after a loss of 3-1 was telling us how he had a myriad of texts saturday morning of players in the 1st team who couldn’t turn up due to various reasons. The absence of seven key players was definately going to project on the score. But on a positive note, their league table standing is/was still unaffected.

The last game for the season takes place next week. At this juncture it is important to stress that as a club, chances are higher for the seconds to improve their rankings as they are a close third at the moment. The first’s and thirds will most likely remain in the same spot.

Rumour has it that Atom Amrit really shone on the pitch for the firsts. Well done for having the guts to face much stronger players.

To sum it up, it was a good day. Above all, the majority of us had fun. Yes we do fight, bicker, moan and complain, ah yes and gossip too, but our strength lies in behaving as a team and not as seperate entities within the club. We always do better when we get on with it as Coach/Chief Spectator/ Team Manager/ Head Honcho says. Abit more communication between the coaches and captains of all three teams would help to alleviate any misunderstandings amongst ourselves. Key word is More.

I would personaly like to thank all our team/Club members for showing some respect to each other. It’s a grown up thing to do.

Satnam Singh

The game started. It was a hard game. Our boys gave it their all. We scored. Then they scored. Then we scored and they scored. Then they scored. It was half time. We boosted ourselves at half time with lemon and pani. Ok so there was no lemon. Sorry.

The second half started. They played well. We played better. They were good. We are the best. They looked. We scored.

We won, Hurray!!! sorry….hurray.

(on a serious note) Keep it up boys, we need some promotions from you guys!! Well done.

Satnam Singh

After the hassles of the week and emails flying out endlessly what a way to cap it up than a game of Hockey?? Yet again Top Dog managed to scramble a team. Good old faithful right half was scouting in Africa, although someone similar was spotted sitting outside the fence on his car bonnet. Tandeep is a write off this season due to a twisted back….. watching too much ’strictly come dancing’. Impeccable Sunny was expecting another kind of bundle of joy, not just hockey (any results?) and Manj told the missus he was going to play hockey. Did anyone see him play hockey on saturday??? Well apart from the 5 minutes of prime time that Coach/ Chief Spectator/ Outstanding Player/ Head Honcho gave him and posing for pictures. But he had an excuse…something about poxy kukus???

And without a Jaikara (how could we forget that?!?!?!?) we started our seasons second to last league game. The opponents actually almost match us in the league standings and a win for them would see us swapping positions. We had to give it our all. Just when we thought we were invincible the opponents thundered our boards in the first fifteen minutes.

We had to request the special services ( yes , special as in special needs) of our only spectator who proved that lame excuses are not necessary to perform some moves. He played well despite his …um…well….needs? Lack of training perhaps? Somehow he had some good combination with Farasi ya miguu mbili anakimbia bila mafuta na kunyaamba ovyo ovyo!!! Lakini siku hizi Sharon anapenda kuja mbele kama shindano ya daktari!!!

JD the marathon runner runs out of pitch…..perhaps we need to increase the hockey field size to 127 yards. Amazingly, it’s only when he passes the ball that we score!!! Good running, poor releasing, too much dribbling and too much faking injuries…oyee mundeya, ki kavan tenu??

Nodi played well, good running on the wing, sadly not being spotted earlier by the rest of the midfield and forwards, myself included as a culprit. Sorry yaar!! Wear pink Ndururu, then we’ll spot u! The youngest player on the pitch played excellent. Ran up and down the field, chased opponents, made good passes and even scored!!! Well done young lad, keep it up. Chasing the lassies is no waste of effort after all, it all adds to practise (I do not condone this by the way!!!)

Koolbeer, kondo na macho mbaya anapoteza mpira mara mbili, mjinga!! And before you can say ‘koro…..ga’ (no it’s not karoga, that is punjabi) they have scored again. Damn those Pargat Singh thighs seem only for show then, eh? How could we be two nil down and not do anything about it? At half time pep talk by The Top Mbwa saw the fauji’s going back to battle with a vengeance.

Our good old team mates from seconds allowed us to play Sukhy, thanks khati billi (punjabi) Kraptain!!! And thanks Sukhy. That bolstered our defense. Amrit the atom made dashes with good one two passes with the young kijana and scored. Top Dog with his curved bent stick this time managed to hit the ball sataraight (yes sataraight) into the opponents goal from a short corner. Kini vari utleh kuteh nu keya ke sidi mar, tavi bingi marda rhenda, khenda oneh kadhi sidi jalebi nahi deki.

And talking of jalebi’s, Sharon the farasi yaa miguu mbili anakimbia bila mafuta gave me the ‘offisial permishon tu ndiribo the mpira mpaka kwa D’ lakini Top Dog ana sema anataka nikuje mbele ya opponent kuchukwa mpira. Hiyo ni point sawa sawa.

At this juncture we cannot ignore the level of commitment that some players have to the thirds team, they do not miss training on tuesdays, attend every game on saturday and play with all their vigour. One such player is Papu our invaluable Goal Keeper. In very hard times, when we lacked a keeper, he donned the padded suit and has never looked back, he’s a regular first 11 player now. It takes guts to face the ball coming towards you at high speeds especially in the D. Despite our few losses, and we’ve only lost 4 games, Papu has shown relentless will power to improve his skill and play against stronger opponents, making remarkable and crucial saves against all odds. Bravo mere veer Papu, keep it up. We all back you and are there for you dude!!!

We drew that game despite our valiant effort.

I am made to believe that our next game against Reading Uni has been forfeited by them as they are unable to raise a team. So as part of my sewa, I am willing to don a yellow or red shirt this weekend (he hopes!?!)

Bole so nihal, sat sri akaaaal!!!

Satnam Singh

With the support of a vast majority of the Hockey Team I present our weekend hockey report.

The Firsts were playing a rather weaker side than they played the previous weekend and we expected some good results having held MK to a 2-1 only loss before. There was a scare in the early days when the opponents scored from a short corner but this was annulled after the two kalasingha refs consulted each other. Phew!! we thought we had a break.

But soon after they had Ndugu running through a maze in a plain field and our keeper sprawled as if on a weekend in SOHO. Blonkey (?) make some astounding saves, diving from all angles, tackling from positions that would impress Graham Norton. Maki kept pestering the opponents with solid ball-on-the- stick runs. Rajee as usual played his heart out, running up and down the field.

Some very delayed whistles had our lead worker ant Sach in a spot of bother. He questioned rightly so since he had cut through a few opponents when the ref blew. The millenuim dome could have been built in that time!!!! Talking of delays, what’s with smacking the opponents legs long after the whistle has blown, eh Parmi? The showers had an early visitor when the yellow card was dished out. But well played both of you, gave it your best.

Kisumu star Kaptaini Prabbie rolled over like a good border collie expecting biscuits! Only this time he wasn’t doing it willingly, he was pushed over by an opponent. What do these guys get by flooring our boys, yaar??? Prabbie, the final cut eludes you bruv! Polish that and you’ll be sounding the boards like a Vegas Coin Machine. Something to work towards for next season. Ehvi bahane na banayee jaa, tere kol dham te legs vi hegiyaan, ohna nu use kar praaaaaah!!!!

Our third team export Amrit made a brilliant simple solo move just short of scoring from the half line to the D. We have to admit their defense was quite solid. Keep it up lad, you have alot of potential, we haven’t seen your best yet.

One thing I noticed was their keeper voicing orders at his team, sort of controlling their positions, like Colin Powell did sitting in his office during the Gulf War. I believe if our boys had more verbal support on the pitch amongst themselves perhaps they could play more cohesively and better. It is when we do not like being told things that we often discover we were doing the wrong thing in the first place. Look, listen, learn. Why does our keeper have to have nightmares of the sound of the boards every saturday night? There were at least 5 this time round!! What is the rest of the team doing to prevent this? Why are the Simbas not roaring??? We have to question ourselves.

The answers lie within us. There are an incredible number of players with tremendous skills who somehow refuse to let it burst out on match days. C’mon boys we know you can do better, let’s all work towards it as a team.

Bhul chuk maaf,

Satnam Singh.